Wednesday, October 18, 2017

get ready guys ...

I leave in a week ... I've been asked how I'm feeling? am I scared, am I nervous? am I excited? to all of the above the answer is YES.

guys, I'm about to travel half way around the world ... to a country where I don't speak the language (I tried to learn, my brain can't seem to process it) as a first time adoptive mom and that's nerve wracking!

but more at the forefront of my mind is that half way around the world a little girl's entire world is about to flipped upside down, and we don't know if she is even aware of this. she's about to be taken away from everything she's ever known ... and as excited as I am to finally have her in my arms, I am so heartbroken for her.

the truth is that even though I do have fears (the facts are there, if you have educated yourself regarding adoption you are very aware that it is not the rainbows & sunshine gotcha day video that you saw ... don't get me wrong, those videos are beautiful and special - and heck yah we'll have one - but adoption is a big, huge deal full of unknowns, trauma, grieving, and so much more) I feel they pale in comparison to what our new daughter is about to go through.

please be in prayer for her precious spirit and heart. I want the heavens stormed for my beautiful girl! I want her to know that I am there to love her forever - that I am safe, that I will care for her, that we are hers!

and please pray for me too, in particular I need prayer that my emotions can stay in tact, I'm so nervous I will cry and freak her out! (I'm a crier, after all, and I just imagine finally seeing her in person is going to bring up every emotion from these eleven months!)

and know, I am choosing to go with strength and I would love it if you would pray along with me for that!
I have a theme song! I know, I know, me and my theme songs! (haha) but I am holding these words (aka: lyrics) close to my heart as prayers to get me through this journey. it's not a new song, but it's new to me and I more than love it!! lions by skillet

I am strong when I am weak,
I will trust, and overcome
I will defy my inhibition
by His power, I will go
I don't want safe and quiet, I don't want to run and hide
this is our time, I'm not gonna miss it
He's gone before us
I'll take it hard in faith - with every step I take
I will walk as a lion








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